When Should you order invitations, when should you send and who sends them? Etiquette Part 2

When Should the Invitations Be Ordered?

If formal invitations will be used, they should be ordered as soon as
the wedding date is set and the style has been determined. If possible,
the matching envelopes should be obtained before the printed invitations
are ready. This allows the time-consuming task of addressing to
be started before the invitations arrive. When ordering the invitations,
it’s important to order plenty of extras. It’s far cheaper to order extras
than to have to reorder. Also, remember that the invitations won’t be
ordered according to the number of people that are attending—instead,
couples and family groups should be counted together. (That
is, although there are 100 guests, 100 invitations won’t be needed—
perhaps only 50 or so.) Extra envelopes should also be ordered to
allow for addressing mistakes.

When Should the Invitations Be Sent?
For a large wedding, the invitations should be sent at least six to eight
weeks in advance; for a smaller, less formal wedding, they can be sent
as little as 10 days before. However, it’s naturally better to send the
invitations out earlier. This will give the guests time to send regrets if
necessary, and will allow the bride to get an accurate final count for
menu planning. Also, when invitations are sent early, the guests will
have more time to make travel plans.

If a weekend of activities will surround the wedding (especially during
a holiday), it’s very important to get the word out before the formal
invitations are sent. It may be a good idea to send out “Save the
Date” cards before the formal invitations in these circumstances. Or,
personal notes that inform family and friends that “Doris and Ken
plan to be married on New Year’s weekend” will allow guests to
make early travel, hotel, and vacation plans.

Who Sends the Invitations?
The question of who issues the invitations to a wedding can be complicated,
especially if parents are divorced or deceased. However, the
easiest way to think about this is to remember that a wedding reception
is a type of party. As with any party, the people who organize
and pay for it will issue the invitations.

Therefore, if the bride’s parents are hosting the wedding, they’ll issue
the invitations in their own names. Many circumstances can affect
this, however. If the groom’s family is sharing a large part of the wedding
costs, they should be considered to be co-hosts, and their names
should be included on the invitation. If the bride and groom are paying
the wedding costs, they should issue the invitations themselves in
their own names.

This is increasingly common today, with many
older brides and grooms paying for their own weddings