To be or not to be...bridey

Did we miss the memo that the minute you get engaged, you are supposed to transform into Bride Barbie?

When I got engaged, I told myself I wasn't going to use Bridelines as a soapbox, but we think this is a necessary topic and hope it is well-received by other brides-to-be. Since I got engaged only 3 weeks ago, multiple people (not that I’m counting) have said to me “You are not being a good bride” or “You are not very enthusiastic” or “You are not bridey enough.”

Anyone whose ever planned a wedding, or any big event for that matter, knows it’s not all smiles and champagne toasts. Weddings require lots of planning, organization and usually come with a bit (or a ton) of stress.

While perusing through pictures of floral arrangements may be a delightful way to avoid concentrating on your job, it becomes less delightful when your fiancé who has never uttered an opinion since you’ve known him is now demanding peach roses.

Thinking about lying on a beach chair in your hut in Bora Bora while someone serves you pina coladas sounds wonderful, but creating an Excel sheet of your budget, while calling a travel agent six times a day as you simultaneously compare prices on Expedia doesn't sound quite as wonderful.

Think about those random run-ins you have with someone from high school - when they ask how you are and what you’ve been up to and you respond with overly fake, cheerful answers. We are all capable of acting cheery, enthusiastic and fake. After all, this is how we get jobs and have conversation on first dates, however, the difference is – those people don’t know anything about you and those conversations last 2-40 minutes.

Now try doing that for 365 days (give or take depending on the length of your engagement).

It is almost impossible for anyone to be excited all the time, so if we don’t put 15 exclamation points in our emails about our wedding planning, forgive us…

There are all kinds of brides and whichever type you choose to be, embrace it. We can’t all be Bride Barbie, and even if I had the choice, I wouldn't want to be. After all, Barbie and Ken divorced in 2004.