the bride i never thought I would be

taken from wedbykez.com

The thoughts of Ami in her puff pieces blog have me thinking...

Today I am 30 and about to embark on a journey so far removed where I thought I would be 3, 5 , 10 years ago that is almost makes chalk and cheese look compatible.

So in answer to the question "Am I where I thought I would be 5 years Ago" I thought I would share where I thought I would be...

3 Years Ago

At 27 I was set to chuck it all in. I had just resigned from NXFM, was leaving the career that had so dominated my life for 7 years and really didn't know what direction life was going to take me. There was gym and work and that was all. I did recognise that if I didn't affect a massive change in my life, I was going to be an "all work, no play girl." . I was convinced that all men were evil and that I could survive alone.. because I had too. Relationships were for the emotionally dependant and the weak of character.

5 Years Ago

At 25 I thought I was living the dream life. I was in Brisbane, almost insanely brown (like a crispy honey chicken) as thin as I have ever been and out every weekend, partying hard. 25 was to me, what 18 is to most girls. Nothing I wore was below knee length and tops were tight and fitting. My hair was so blonde it was almost transparent and I wanted to be Gwen Stefani. Sounds perfect? Well, it wasn't. I was emotionally retarded by confused attraction, trying to be something I never was and desperate to please everyone else bar myself. The up side, I had some fabulous shoes.

10 Years Ago

Talk about polar opposites. At 20, I was maxing out at 105 kilos. Was mid-way through a Classical Music Degree in Performing (opera) and thought I could be the next Cecilia Bartoli. I was unemployed because Uni and rehearsals were all consuming and generally lost because the support and encouragement for my music that existed at High School wasn't offered in the University structure. As much as I tried to convince myself I was happy - I was not.

Now

I am 30. I love 30. I control my life, my financials, my job and I am self-sufficient, fulfilling my own needs and ecstatically happy because I met someone I choose to be with. The relationship I am in is not one of necessity, but one of desire to share and co-exist with the one person I truly love.

So why am I using Wedbykez.com to write this blog?

One is to let all brides-to-be know it's ok to eat your words. In fact, I love that for 27 years of my life I was so wrong about where my future would take me.

And reason two is to share with all couples how important it is to recognise where you have come from when writing and scripting your ceremony and have an input into the wording of your ceremony.

For us (Myself and the fiance) picking versus from a book isn't the right thing to do. We have been blessed in how we found each other, and we want our ceremony to reflect that.

We sat down on Saturday and wrote the story of us, so that the ceremony we have on October 3, is intensely personal and a perfect fit for our life together.

Thanks again Ami for the inspiration!