Mother of the bride fashion etiquette 101

As the mother of the bride, you have many duties leading up to the wedding and on the big day itself. Your daughter will rely on you for a myriad of tasks.  You’ll probably be attending appointments with her to meet with possible wedding vendors.  You’ll definitely visit dress shops to help her pick out the gown of her dreams.  And, you’ll most likely be her main support person when wedding stress threatens to overwhelm her.  Throughout all this, you can’t forget about yourself though.  On the big day, it is the mother of the bride who is the hostess of the entire event.  You’ll be the second most looked at person of the wedding, and your outfit will be the second most talked about.  There are a few tradition and etiquette rules to keep in mind when searching for your mother of the bride outfit.

It is customary for the mother of the bride to shop for her wedding outfit before the mother of the groom.  Since the mother of the bride is the hostess of the event, this was traditionally done so that the mother of the groom wouldn’t out-dress  the bride’s mom or choose an outfit in a color or style that would clash with the mother of the bride.  For the mother of the bride, this tradition does add some pressure to an already stressful time.  As women, we all know how difficult it is to shop for such a special occasion.   Sometimes this process can take weeks or even months.  Be considerate and shop early.  Give yourself enough time to find the perfect outfit, but remember that the groom’s mother wants to find her perfect outfit as well.  As soon as you find your outfit, be sure to let the groom’s mother know the style and color of the dress you chose so she can begin shopping. 

If the wedding is approaching quickly and you still haven’t found the perfect outfit, be kind and let the mother of the groom know she can shop for her outfit without waiting for you to settle on your outfit.  Just have a discussion about how formal you’d like to dress for the wedding.  Hopefully that will prevent embarrassment if the groom’s mother mistakenly chooses a long formal gown while you had a knee-length cocktail dress in mind.

Most wedding etiquette experts agree that you should avoid the colors white, off-white, champagne, beige and even black.  However, the hottest colors for mother of the bride outfits right now are beige and champagne.  A better rule of thumb would be to avoid matching whatever color the bride is wearing.   The fashion runways are full of wedding gowns in a wide variety of colors now – white, pink, nude, champagne and black.  Just avoid wearing whatever color your daughter is wearing.  If she’s wearing white, don’t wear white.  If your daughter’s gown is beige, nude or champagne, don’t wear beige, nude or champagne.

For a long time, black was never to be worn at weddings.  It was frowned upon, and thought of as the color for funerals and mourning.   But times have changed, and now every woman owns a perfect, little black dress.  There are even black wedding gowns in the new Vera Wang 2012 Fall Bridal Line.  After all, the color black is chic, classy and slimming.  To wear black appropriately to a wedding, make sure you choose a style that works for a celebration, as well as for the season and time of day or night.  Then, a black dress can be the perfect choice.

The most important tip to remember is to keep the lines of communication open.  Talk with your daughter about what she envisions for her big day.  Talking things out will eliminate tension and make it as easy and stress free as possible to find the perfect mother of the bride outfit.  Most importantly, it will allow you to enjoy and savor this special time in your life with your daughter.

When you are ready to begin shopping, please visit Frox of Falkirk for mother of the bride outfits, mother of the groom outfits and special occasion dresses and accessories.