BridalTweet Wedding Forum & Vendor Directory

Cultivating a GREAT Relationship with Your Future Mother-In-Law

When my son Trevor and his now wife Kathryn started dating and I wanted to get to know her, I did EVERYTHING wrong! Funny thing is; I met her when my son was away at school and thought: “She would be perfect for Trevor”.

I took her out for lunch and over a two hour interrogation ended by asking her what her intentions were towards my son. I scared her and made her upset all at the same time. I didn’t realize all this until a couple of months later when my son told me. I felt horrible. I really wanted a close relationship with Kathryn because one day they might get married. I needed to fix this and fast.

As I got to know Kathryn better, I decided that I was not going to be known as an annoying, bossy and interfering mother. I backed off big time and just got to know her. After they got engaged, I made an effort to get to know her family and build a strong relationship with Kathryn. I supported their decisions for the wedding and I was vocal in my support of their marriage and their relationship.

Nine years later, Kathryn and I are closer than ever. In fact, she is my indispensable Office Manager for Custom Clergy Services. She is also the beautiful mom for my 3 amazing grandchildren. Moms can be very protective of their sons. As a result, moms can sometimes see the daughter-in-law as competition. This couldn’t be further from the truth in my eyes and heart. I didn’t lose a son; I gained another daughter.

As a bride, let me encourage you to include your future mother-in-law in the wedding planning. Don’t let her take control, but if she knows you value her input, it will go a long way to building a strong relationship.

You both have something in common that you can build on: you love the same man! Kathryn and her mom went out of their way to include me in certain aspects of the wedding planning. There were some things that were reserved for the bride and her mom and I understood that.

Because Kathryn and I both committed to knowing and loving one another, we enjoy a great friendship and mom/daughter relationship.

For more information on how you can cultivate a really great relationship with your mother-in-law, email us atinfo@customclergyservices.com; visit our website at www.customclergyservices.com or call Cathy at 403-805-7044 to set up an appointment.

WEDDING TOUCH POINT:

Everyone needs to know they have value. Whether you are the bride or the mother-in-law, remember that you are gaining a new family member and that is a huge reason to celebrate!